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Finding Bliss

Many of you know of my personal afflictions, depression and generalized anxiety disorder, and if you suffer with these illness like I do, then you know how hard it is when a curve ball comes hurtling toward you at breakneck speeds threatening to derail the train of normalcy.

Sometimes it's super minor, like someone asks for something that isn't part of the normal routine. Other times, the cars transmission shits the bed and you find yourself needing to buy a new car when you were not planning to.

I'm in the latter category this week.

Stress and I have a complicated relationship. Sometimes, I find myself staring down at it daring it to conquer me, other times, I find myself crippled under it's intense stare. I have to admit, I'm feeling a bit crippled today.

I looked at Donald Trump's Twitter this morning. I rolled my eyes, and closed Twitter entirely. I'm sick of him. I need to look inside myself and find my own personal bliss. I've realized that original sin all stems from ego. The seven deadly sins all point to self-gratification and it's up to us to fight against our own ego to overcome the desire to fall into the pit of selfishness.

Lust - sexual pleasure in excess
Gluttony - food in excess
Greed - money and stuff in excess
Sloth - lazy with all things in excess
Wrath - anger, grudges, hatred
Envy - wanting things that don't belong to you
Pride - vanity, narcissism, self inflation, excessively

I'm trying to look at my current crisis as a blessing and it will likely end up being a blessing. I have to have faith in that fact.

When I look at the tragedy of Donald Trump and his supporters, I see the worst of humanity and I don't want to be anything like them. I fight against that part of myself as much as possible.

I'm on a search to find bliss and there is no bliss in ignorance. There is bliss in acceptance and in knowing. 

As I sit here trying to figure out what to do about my dead car, I will be praying for guidance from whatever energy force controls all things and I will ask for a clear and open mind.

Stay positive everyone.

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