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Don't Ask!

Every woman of childbearing age has had that awkward experience of being asked if they are pregnant, when they aren't.

This happened to me in March and it jumpstarted me into my fitness regime, so maybe it was good motivation, but it happens all too often and I want to talk about it.

Pregnancy is a deeply personal thing. It isn't something that should be pried out of someone, it should be willingly shared. Even if a woman is asked, and she is pregnant, she might not want you to know, otherwise, perhaps she would have told you.

I have two children, but have had three pregnancies. Miscarriage represents 25% of all pregnancies and is a part of being pregnant. In fact, miscarriage is medically classified as "spontaneous abortion" because that's what happens. Women started to become uncomfortable with the term because of the negativity surrounding abortions as a whole.

When this woman approached me in March, she touched my stomach, which made it worse, and said, "Ohh, what do you have here?" And I repeated, more than once, "Just my shirt, it's a bulky shirt." and it was. But no. Just don't.

It pisses me off that abortion is a topic of conversation when we have fought for HIPAA laws. It pisses me off that women are subjected to humiliating and hurtful questions because people can't mind their own business. If you don't want an abortion, don't get one. Just like I have no plans whatsoever to get a vasectomy. You follow me?

When my first child was eight weeks old, a woman asked me if I was pregnant. No, I was still carrying the baby weight because my baby was EIGHT WEEKS OLD!

After my miscarriage, when I got pregnant with my second child, someone asked me if I was pregnant. It put me in a tough spot because I didn't want to say, "no" because I didn't want to jynx the pregnancy, but I didn't want to say "yes" because I didn't know if the pregnancy would be viable since it was still early. I don't actually remember what my response was, but I somehow dodged it.

Pregnancy is emotional and it's not up for public discussion unless the pregnant woman invites you to the table. If you suspect a woman is pregnant, just wait, all will become clear eventually and if you suspect she is and nothing happens, then you were wrong.

Just stop asking women that. It's awful.

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